Generally, narcissists don’t gift like normal people. Their gift-giving pattern is different compared to the usual tradition. When people give someone a gift they think about that person and what they like. Narcissists on the other hand, usually don’t give gifts but when they do, they give priority to their agenda rather than the gift recipient.
Narcissists can be interesting consociates. They always try to convince people about their abilities and make people believe that their brilliance is as blinding because this is what they think of themselves. These types of people cast their charisma and charm to other people and do all types of things they can to keep people’s focus on their façade of perfection.
Types Of Narcissists Gift Givers
Narcissists are very bad at gift-giving. They are self-centered and they know very little about you. So it’s a false hope to expect a gift of your choice. However, this type of behavior from narcissists has nothing to do with greed or having a “high nail” about gifts. It’s totally about narcissists’ shenanigans when it comes to gift-giving.
Some narcissists will give you a gift that is something like free tiny soaps and free travel-size shampoo bottles they collect from hotel rooms. Sometimes they collect free sets of mini screwdrivers from Menards and give them as gifts.
This type of narcissist will give you a nice present and in many cases an expensive one. They will try to show you that they have put a lot of time, care, and thought into the gift. But there are problems with this type of gift-giving. To the narcissists, “gift” doesn’t mean what you think and there are strings attached to every gift they give. They give you an expensive gift so that you owe them big time! They make you feel that you are in debt.
This type of narcissist will give you a gift that they like instead of what you like. This is because they think they know better and have much finer taste than you. Sometime they will purchase a gift for the person they imagine we are or wish that we were instead of buying a gift for who we are. This type of gift will create a burden for you as you have to pretend someone else to accept the gift.
This type of narcissist steals from you and they will use a small portion of the money they stole from you to purchase a gift for you. They will buy you a gift to assuage their guilty conscience. For example, they might steal the battery of your car and gift you an antique table saw that won’t work to assuage their conscience.
Downsides Of Gift-Giving With A Narcissist
1. Most of the time the narcissist will tell you that you didn’t give them a nice gift but it doesn’t mean that you will receive a nice gift from them. On the other hand, if you say that you don’t like their gift, you will be avoided as a form of punishment and you won’t hear the end of it.
2. We all know that there are some gift-giving rules available. Narcissist can play with the rules if they want and they won’t follow the rules. But, you have to stick to the rules and the narcissist might return your gift because you didn’t follow the rules.
3. If the narcissist asks you what type of gift you want, then you can rest assure that you won’t get the gift that you were asking. Moreover, if you say that you don’t like the gift or don’t get what you ask for then the narcissist will point out that you are ungrateful or they will stonewall you.
4. If you consider taking the narcissist to the shop for buying his/her gift so that they can pick their own gift then they will call you heartless and uncaring. You can try explaining to them the reason but they will take it as an insult.
5. Sometimes, the narcissist might ask for a gift that is way out of your price range. They do this type of thing because they think they are worth this extravagant price. When you refuse to give the gift because of the high price and you explain the reason; they will still take it as a sign of your lack of love for him/her. They will make you feel guilty so that you would buy the gift and end up paying a large bill.
6. The narcissist might buy you an inexpensive gift but he/she will buy something very expensive for him/her on the same shopping trip. They will buy you an item of little value or thought but show off the expensive watch they bought themselves when they are at the shopping mall.
7. The narcissist might be talking about something and you buy that item to give them as a gift and thinking that this time you will give them a gift that they will like but you are wrong. The narcissist will complain about the gift by telling you that they never asked for that particular item as a gift. They will deny the truth and might twist your own words.
8. If the narcissist gives you something valuable or pricy then they will leave the price tag on your gift. They do this type of thing not because you can return the gift if you want but show you how much money he/she has spent on you. This way they want to owe you!
You have to accept the fact that the narcissist will never change. They think that they are right and everyone is wrong or has a problem. So be careful when you are exchanging gifts with the narcissist. Don’t expect anything from them as well as don’t expect them to like your gift. You can exchange gifts with the narcissist in normal circumstances but if there is any condition or string attached than beware!